Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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