Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
