She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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