I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
