I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
