it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
