ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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