Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
