At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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