I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
