i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
