Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
