and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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