I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
