i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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