...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize
