I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Randomize
