I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize