i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
