Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
They have beer where we have blood.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
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