Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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