tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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