"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
