dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
