"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize
