Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
