So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
do herpes really smell.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
