True but thats because hes a fetus.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize
