Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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