I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
