Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
