do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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