I wannas sexs uuuuu
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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