My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
