The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
