super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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