Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
