I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize