It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I need a beard to bite.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
i think we sleep fucked last night...
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize