I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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