I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
