dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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