Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
3 2 1 whiskey
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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