is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
