Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
