if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
her facebook's as public as her vagina
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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