New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
There are leaves in my underwear?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
