She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
