just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
