I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
