I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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